Friday, September 23, 2005

SitC Online

I don't know if you read Gamasutra, but I found out about an interesting new product called "Spend the Night". It is "a female-centric, sexually-themed multiplayer dating game and community". One of their new employees's said, "There’s a myth that women aren’t interested in erotic content, which is totally untrue. Women are just as interested in sex as men are, but there is little in the way of online content for this vast market." Someone should take this a step further. They need to add a license to get the mass-market appeal! Women interested in sex? What license matches that? "Sex in the City" of course! Think about the great gameplay "Sex in the City Online" would have! You can have promiscuous sexual romps in the safety of your computer screen! You can meet up with your girlfriends and talk about the important issues in your life, the things that really matter: promiscuous sexual romps. I mean, people complain that women aren't interested in games because they are reduced to sex symbols. Now women can do the same thing to men! I mean because really, the problem with objectifying women is not because it's degrading and reinforces men equating them to objects, it is the unfairness because men aren't treated as objects too! It's all about equal treatment even if it's bad treatment. So, think about all the fun things women would do in "SitC Online". You could buy expensive clothing, where the amount of cloth in the garment is inversely proportional to the price. You could have sex. You could go shoe shopping and organize them in your massive shoe closet. You could have sex with strangers. You could wear your fancy shoes and slutty clothes, go out, pick up a guy (or multiple guys) and have sex with him/them! I can't imagine a game that would be MORE appealing to women, except maybe we also need to make a "Desperate Housewives Online" to get the coveted older women demographic. This game is the breakthrough title that game developers need to finally solve the problem of women not being interested in games.


Anonymous Jubal_Harshaw said...

I have often thought that massively-multiplayer online games (with their bizarre plots, limited interaction, and lack of anything that approximates real life) would be perfect for on-line, interactive soap-operas.

It's the perfect way to get women 'into' games, and it helps that the people who write soap opera plots and the people who write computer game plots are both similarly divorced from reality.

As you have shown us, oh great one, the way to make women play games is to make them as improbable and mundane as the shows they watch. Genius!

Really, all you have to do is change the setting, characters and quests. Watch!

Old setting: Dark and dank Ye Olde King's Head Tavern.

NEW setting: New, well-lit Wine Bar with a stupid german name or something.

Old character: Brute, the expert swordsman and hero (Level 30).

NEW character: Sara, the expert alcoholic and cocktease (Level 30).

Old quest: Search the dungeons for the magical barrier, disable it and search for some magical trinket. Try not to get eaten alive by mutant rats.

New quest: Figure out whether you left your diaphragm in last night, whilst walking to another wine bar. Try not to get raped by mutant rats.

This is almost as good as my hamster-controlled shoot-em-up / spelling game / strobe generator.

1:31 PM  
Blogger The BIG G said...

Jubal_harshaw: Where do I buy your hamster-controlled shoot-em-up / spelling game / strobe generator? That sounds awesome!

11:07 PM  

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