Saturday, March 25, 2006

The Next Hit Tycoon Game

The tycoon games are running out of ideas. Zoo Tycoon, Roller Coaster Tycoon, Cruise Line Tycoon, Tycoon City, Tycoon University and Porn Tycoon (Playboy the Mansion). Here's an idea! Spam Tycoon. Yes, you run a junk e-mail company, and you have to spam as many people as possible. You start by spamming with the penis enlargement pill ads. You work your way through OEM software, prescription software and web design until you are sending out fake press releases giving stock tips. (I don't purchase individual stocks, but I'm guessing most people who do can afford spam filters or don't get stock tips from spammers. But, maybe the spammers are banking on fools who will soon be parted of their money)

Have your company hire programmers to create programs to crawl the web for e-mail addresses. Create strategies for text in the spam to avoid those pesky Bayesian filters. If you want to break the law, then you can start phishing scams, send out those pleas to help launder millions of dollars, and hack boxes in order to use them to spam as many people as you can. But be careful! If you don't treat your employees well, they may report you to the cops! Your game will end if you get arrested. Yes, if you like simulations, then Spam Tycoon will be an enjoyable romp while you go from someone hand e-mailing pieces of spam to your friends to a vast spamming empire that is annoying people world wide!


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm starting to think that maybe you're just regurgitating your dad's opinions. These opinions seem kind of... old. Not old like 'old hat' or like 'yesterday's news'. Old like an old woman. Like Cosby sweaters and bow-ties. It doesn't suit you. I love it though. It keeps me coming back, like the 'Duke Nukem Forever' forums.

3:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Can you write a column about how there are too many sequels?

12:35 AM  
Blogger The BIG G said...

That seems like a reasonable idea. I just may do that when I get a chance.

-The BIG G

1:05 AM  
Blogger marion said...

I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I dont know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.


9:12 PM  

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